PhD ...insight for men, wake up call for women
My father gave me 2 pieces of advice about women that i'll never forget.
My father gave me 2 pieces of advice about women that i'll never forget.
One: don't knock one up until you're full and ready (Pause, haha). And Two: don't take a woman that makes much less money than you.
He didn't elaborate on it, nor do I think I was ready for his explanation, so I took it upon myself to justify the advice. Number one goes without question. Number two I guess it's because she won't have enough to offer. She's thinking bus when you're thinking cab, she's thinking South Beach when you're thinking Prague, she's thinking cinema when you're thinking Broadway. You get the drift... What is she going to bring to the table?
Girls in my bracket give problems too. We're always duking it out for the check. We're subtly battling over who's lotion is better. "Baby, try this Curel. It's feeling something like the bomb!" "Boo-bee cakes! Get in on this Nivea. It'll have you looking like fancy vinyl!" Though we are always interested in the same things, the problem is that we are always interested in the same things. And we each try to make the same things better. We supposed to take over, but I caught her bumping Ether.
Then I examined girls who's pocket books reflect their careers, got degrees, and smarter than the average bear. They teach me all types of great things that was beneficial to my growth: 'good' versus 'well'; appropriately tipping; and places that I HAVE to wear shoes to.
Btw, if you're a guy, you should own at least one nightlife outfit and one business suit (it's ok, being dressed appropriately doesn't take away from your gangsta). But I digress...
With the gift of knowledge and extravagant experiences, comes blows to my male ego. I have no leverage over these women. They are intelligent, confident, well-taken-care-of, and experiences that make them so relateable. Girls with Masters, PhD's, JD's, etc. have no time to stroke your ego, but focus their time on making sure that their swag is cold. I was on an adventure field trip with one of these Masters of the Universe. I considered not getting a video made of the event because of the extra monetary cost. My overqualified lady friend says "You're not getting the video?!" Such a loaded question. Well she kicked me right in the...uh uh uh Ego...right in my uh uh uh Ego! So I bought the video...Women!
In conclusion I say this: Thanks dad. Further, you overqualified women need not work hard to get a man. But that's not to say it's easy for you. It's wildly hard! The harder you try, the poorer quality of guys you get. I would say I feel bad, but I really don't. What am I going to do about my ego, woman?! And I can't empathize because I will never be in your predicament. Whether I remain an ignoramus, or become educated, whether I gain weight or remain an adonis (stroke my big ego), I will still have as many options as I do now. Stay strong, overqualified women. The dating pool for you is very slim. Rent "Something New", get that Vanilla Swiss Almond Haagen Daaz, and make it a Blockbuster Night.
Random Thought
Girls meet me and think that because I'm a man of good humor, that I don't need for them to make me laugh. They think my spirits remain high. Like I'm at funerals playing pranks on people. Such is not the case. I am, in fact, one of the most depressed people you'll meet because there is no one to make me smile. When you see me, readers, tell your best joke. Make my day.
He didn't elaborate on it, nor do I think I was ready for his explanation, so I took it upon myself to justify the advice. Number one goes without question. Number two I guess it's because she won't have enough to offer. She's thinking bus when you're thinking cab, she's thinking South Beach when you're thinking Prague, she's thinking cinema when you're thinking Broadway. You get the drift... What is she going to bring to the table?
Girls in my bracket give problems too. We're always duking it out for the check. We're subtly battling over who's lotion is better. "Baby, try this Curel. It's feeling something like the bomb!" "Boo-bee cakes! Get in on this Nivea. It'll have you looking like fancy vinyl!" Though we are always interested in the same things, the problem is that we are always interested in the same things. And we each try to make the same things better. We supposed to take over, but I caught her bumping Ether.
Then I examined girls who's pocket books reflect their careers, got degrees, and smarter than the average bear. They teach me all types of great things that was beneficial to my growth: 'good' versus 'well'; appropriately tipping; and places that I HAVE to wear shoes to.
Btw, if you're a guy, you should own at least one nightlife outfit and one business suit (it's ok, being dressed appropriately doesn't take away from your gangsta). But I digress...
With the gift of knowledge and extravagant experiences, comes blows to my male ego. I have no leverage over these women. They are intelligent, confident, well-taken-care-of, and experiences that make them so relateable. Girls with Masters, PhD's, JD's, etc. have no time to stroke your ego, but focus their time on making sure that their swag is cold. I was on an adventure field trip with one of these Masters of the Universe. I considered not getting a video made of the event because of the extra monetary cost. My overqualified lady friend says "You're not getting the video?!" Such a loaded question. Well she kicked me right in the...uh uh uh Ego...right in my uh uh uh Ego! So I bought the video...Women!
In conclusion I say this: Thanks dad. Further, you overqualified women need not work hard to get a man. But that's not to say it's easy for you. It's wildly hard! The harder you try, the poorer quality of guys you get. I would say I feel bad, but I really don't. What am I going to do about my ego, woman?! And I can't empathize because I will never be in your predicament. Whether I remain an ignoramus, or become educated, whether I gain weight or remain an adonis (stroke my big ego), I will still have as many options as I do now. Stay strong, overqualified women. The dating pool for you is very slim. Rent "Something New", get that Vanilla Swiss Almond Haagen Daaz, and make it a Blockbuster Night.
Random Thought
Girls meet me and think that because I'm a man of good humor, that I don't need for them to make me laugh. They think my spirits remain high. Like I'm at funerals playing pranks on people. Such is not the case. I am, in fact, one of the most depressed people you'll meet because there is no one to make me smile. When you see me, readers, tell your best joke. Make my day.
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