Super Ex Girlfriend

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*sigh*...Ladies, at some point in our lives, we've all played the role of the detective. When we put our minds to it, Sherlock Holmes, CSI, even Inspector Gadget has nothing on us! Eventually you come to realize that its about growth in character in yourself leading to security in your relationship; leading us all to a level of trust that defies all the craziness were ALL capable of.

So Keef is stepping his comedy game up!! Check out a clip from his recent show at Comix. He seems a little bitter but as you'll see the crowd shares his pain.

Workplace Drama...

So its Monday morning, and you get to work with your spirits high (as high as they can be for a Monday) , ready to get your work down and be outta there by 5. Hey, if you like your job, you may even put in the extra effort, go in early and leave later...all that good stuff that's held you in high regards with your co-workers and supervisors...some of them anyway.After some time passes, your hard work is paying off! You get either a raise or promotion. Then for some strange reason, you begin to hear rumors behind your back, and may even start to get the silent treatment. One day without warning, dirty looks start from the coworkers that just brought you coffee and a sesame bagel yesterday! What's up?!!!

The sad truth is that some people are just motivated to come into work for different reasons. Just as some may be all about C.R.E.A.M. , some are just motivated by DRAMA. Knowing who's currently doing what, who may be doing what, who will be doing what and with whom are just need to know information for some people; perhaps to make their horrible lives seem a little better. What's even sadder is that these drama whores never run out of things to talk about. After a while they usually gravitate toward those who are doing their job the way their supposed to. You get a compliment, they roll their eyes, and you get a new office, you’re going to lunch solo. So what do you do?

You do the same thing you've been doing. Keep doing your best to get to where you desire to be. There's 24 hours in a day. If you're spending only 8 -10 of them on the job, who cares what others think about you! The way I see it, some of us need to treat our jobs like a reality TV show… with those girls that desperately try to find” the one" in semi-famous people. You’re ultimately there to earn a paycheck and eventually excel. Don't get me wrong, I've met some great people who are still my genuine friends on the job, but that's not always the case. If your fortunate enough for that to happen, congrats! It’s cool to have someone to get a drink with after a long day and share experiences with. But if it doesn't happen, it’s ok. You're not really there to make friends...it’s a plus. I'm not saying walk around with a screw face and ignore everyone, just be a little cautious with whom you choose to cross the line from" co-worker" to "home girl". If you look closely you'll be able tell who's there for the same reasons you are and who's there to just spread their misery into new territory. Not everyone at work needs to know what club you go to every Saturday, who you're dating etc. The more people you choose to share your life story with, the less upset you can be when its all over the office in a matter of hours. The line is a thin one that if you let stretch too far, can break and backfire. If you feel like you still can't tell who you can trust on the job, just keep your mouth shut and keep it moving.

Facebook: A Requiem for Face to Face...guest entry brought to you by Keef

Ok, let's face it. Technology has straight taken over our lives. In a world full of ichat, aim, facebook, myspace, twitter, blackberry messenger, etc.....its safe to say that we have lost the sincerity that came with just having a conversation! *sigh*....don't you miss the days when calling someone up or visiting someone was a lot easier than texting or writing them an email? When "boo loving "meant spending hours on in on the phone instead of chatting on aim ? When laughter meant really seeing a person smile instead of reading their LOL? Or if its really funny.... reading their, rotfl!!!!!? ugh! I sure do . Check out this latest entry by ya boy Keef. This is why.

“Where were you?! You said that you were coming!”
“No I didn’t!”
“Yeah you did, it’s on Facebook.”

“I haven’t seen you in so long! Wow! I see you have 2 kids, married, and a Masters in Forensic Psychology.”
“Well, that’s pretty much what’s been up. See ya. Hit my wall up.”

Photo comment: “Wow, you wearing the shit out that dress. Remind me of that night…Lol…Remember?”
Boyfriend: “Who’s that?!”
Girlfriend: “Nobody”

“Why does he always have to comment on your photos?”
“First Amendment”
“Seriously?! And he happens to like ALL your status updates?”

“What did you get your mother for her birthday?”
“I wished her ‘Happy Bday’ on her wall.”

PHD...guest entry brought to you by Keef.....

PhD ...insight for men, wake up call for women
My father gave me 2 pieces of advice about women that i'll never forget.

One: don't knock one up until you're full and ready (Pause, haha). And Two: don't take a woman that makes much less money than you.
He didn't elaborate on it, nor do I think I was ready for his explanation, so I took it upon myself to justify the advice. Number one goes without question. Number two I guess it's because she won't have enough to offer. She's thinking bus when you're thinking cab, she's thinking South Beach when you're thinking Prague, she's thinking cinema when you're thinking Broadway. You get the drift... What is she going to bring to the table?
Girls in my bracket give problems too. We're always duking it out for the check. We're subtly battling over who's lotion is better. "Baby, try this Curel. It's feeling something like the bomb!" "Boo-bee cakes! Get in on this Nivea. It'll have you looking like fancy vinyl!" Though we are always interested in the same things, the problem is that we are always interested in the same things. And we each try to make the same things better. We supposed to take over, but I caught her bumping Ether.
Then I examined girls who's pocket books reflect their careers, got degrees, and smarter than the average bear. They teach me all types of great things that was beneficial to my growth: 'good' versus 'well'; appropriately tipping; and places that I HAVE to wear shoes to.
Btw, if you're a guy, you should own at least one nightlife outfit and one business suit (it's ok, being dressed appropriately doesn't take away from your gangsta). But I digress...
With the gift of knowledge and extravagant experiences, comes blows to my male ego. I have no leverage over these women. They are intelligent, confident, well-taken-care-of, and experiences that make them so relateable. Girls with Masters, PhD's, JD's, etc. have no time to stroke your ego, but focus their time on making sure that their swag is cold. I was on an adventure field trip with one of these Masters of the Universe. I considered not getting a video made of the event because of the extra monetary cost. My overqualified lady friend says "You're not getting the video?!" Such a loaded question. Well she kicked me right in the...uh uh uh Ego...right in my uh uh uh Ego! So I bought the video...Women!
In conclusion I say this: Thanks dad. Further, you overqualified women need not work hard to get a man. But that's not to say it's easy for you. It's wildly hard! The harder you try, the poorer quality of guys you get. I would say I feel bad, but I really don't. What am I going to do about my ego, woman?! And I can't empathize because I will never be in your predicament. Whether I remain an ignoramus, or become educated, whether I gain weight or remain an adonis (stroke my big ego), I will still have as many options as I do now. Stay strong, overqualified women. The dating pool for you is very slim. Rent "Something New", get that Vanilla Swiss Almond Haagen Daaz, and make it a Blockbuster Night.

Random Thought
Girls meet me and think that because I'm a man of good humor, that I don't need for them to make me laugh. They think my spirits remain high. Like I'm at funerals playing pranks on people. Such is not the case. I am, in fact, one of the most depressed people you'll meet because there is no one to make me smile. When you see me, readers, tell your best joke. Make my day.

Have you ever felt like, "The Warm-up Girl" ?

This WORLD- a stage
PEOPLE- actors

.....And we're just simply here on this earth each playing our part. In the midst of it all, this thing called love is just a game we play; with players that specialize in winning or losing. Many of us ladies have been the underdog in the game at some point in our lives, and yet we never give that position the credit it deserves.
Until now......

The definition

Warm-up girl-n. A woman that willingly engages a man for a long period of time with aspirations of a commitment. He continues to string her along until this situation results in the man choosing another female to engage in that commitment as he leaves the unsuspecting woman without any remorse .

Game time

In this game called love that we choose to play, this unsuspecting female known as the "warm-up" girl puts over 100% in effort, if not physically, she’ll hand it over emotionally, and is always there when you need her to be in some way. Yet she's always kept on the sidelines, never gets a chance to be a star player in the game , never getting just credit for her role in winning the game....for the rest of the "team" .

Now don't get it twisted....Although she never gets to start in the game of love, her hard work is acknowledged...well...a little bit anyway. After all the effort she's put in, proving to be a good player, the team can't afford to let her go, so the team captain keeps her warming the bench, giving her a few practice plays here and there, so she feels a little important. Just when she feels like maybe, just maybe she is actually appreciated and may get her chance to play....BAM! The real game (which she had no clue was about to begin) starts, she's OUT and here comes another player. She's been on the team for so long but she gets bumped and in comes this chick who was never there to work hard with the team and just shows up reaping the benefits of your infinite sacrifices. And who gets the credit for scoring a goal???? It definitely is not the warm-up girl.

The crazy part is that even though the game is going on as she warms the bench, the team captain checks on her every now and then, just to make sure she's ok over there on the sidelines....just in case he may need to "put her in".
Game over.

How many of us females have played the unsuspecting role of the "warm-up" girl? How many of us have put our ALL into a man who we truly thought had potential to be the man who would retire us from this "game"? There are so many emotions that come over you: hurt, anger, embarrassment, betrayal, among many others. It sucks to feel like all your effort was wasted; and no matter what you do and no matter how hard you try, someone else will mean more. Your pride takes a unimaginable hit that makes recovering harder and harder to achieve yet comprises a wall, easier and easier to build. You thought you did everything right, or at least well enough, so now you begin to ask the dreaded question: "what's wrong with me"? Ladies the answer is nothing. There's nothing wrong with you. Some of us shine so brightly and were not to blame some may choose to keep blinders on so they don't have to face it. It’s easier to make something, anything out of nothing, than it is to work with something strong enough to be established on its own. Our time just hasn't come yet, but when it is our time to shine...on another team, well shine so brightly, that the team you left will always see the glare. As they remain in pursuit of the player they once had.